Ayla's Story

So Ayla's journey into the world was a bit of a longer one but I'm sure it was an interesting one for her never the less. And it was a neat experience for me as well. It's something that people can tell you about but until you have a child you really don't know what to expect. To be honest I didn't think I would be able to do it. But I did and now there's a beautiful baby in my life :)

My labor started on the 30th of August (the Thursday before), I had been having braxton and hicks for months so for all of Thursday I didn't think much of the constant contracting. But this time they were coming regularly, so I kept an eye on them and timed them. They varied from half an hour apart to two hours. At this point they weren't to painful.

I continued all of Thursday night so I thought for sure I would have her Friday. Nope. They continued to be about half an hour apart. By Friday night however they were more painful and got to be about eight minutes apart but again I just kept an eye on it. Eric timed them on my mom's iPad for me. At this point I was doing everything to make the labor progress. Including taking all the herbs I could and bouncing on the rebounder.

Again I didn't sleep on Friday night but the labor was still sparatic. So for the third day in a row I was sitting at home waiting around. But they got more intense and by Saturday night I was in pain. Back labor had started and anyone who had back labor knows that it is probably the worst kind of pain you can experience in labor (almost). They were eight minutes apart but I decided to go to bed.

They continued all night and about five in the morning on Sunday I called Arles and he came over to wait until they were five minutes apart. They finally were at about ten so we all headed to the hospital, where they sent me home because I wasn't dialated enough. We went home and I rested for a while (my contractions were still every five minutes). By dinner they were really hurting so we went to the hospital. They sent me home. Again. They asked if I wanted morphine (seriously???)

I went home frustrated and in pain. I probably cried for most of the evening and by eleven I was in such pain that I really thought I wouldn't make it through this. I had been in 'false' labor for days and was still at home. I went to bed and attempted to sleep between contractions. It didn't work. My mom so willingly helped me through each one, I really couldn't imagine what was going through her head. I was not in a good place at that time. Finally at three I was drained and hadn't even started the real labor yet! I called Arles again and we met him at the hospital. This time I could barely walk. Never had I felt such pain and there was that fear that they would send me home again. I felt that if they did I would have the baby at home (not true but still, I was not exactly rational at this time). But after checking me they found I was four centimeters!!!!!

That's where the hospital labor began. I ordered an epidural as soon as I was admitted and was high on a cloud. I was laughing and feeling like myself again :) I love the epidural. We were all finally able to rest a bit. Arles continuously was making me laugh though. We were pretty excited that we were finally going to meet our baby.

I stayed at four for a while but I didn't mind, I was just enjoying the whole experience. I also enjoyed being able to watch the contraction monitor go way up and then level off. I couldn't feel a thing :). Once I hit five though I had the urge to push. People can tell you that your body knows what to do but until you experience it, you don't really know. So for about an hour I fought the urge to push. That was probably one of the worst parts. I needed to push. Everything in my body told me to push. And I had to fight it.

But when the nurse checked me again I was nine centimeters. One more then I would be on the home stretch. Once she told me I could push I was so relieved that I went right to it. My mom was on one side and Arles was on the other. I went into my zone and fought with everything I had. To this day I still don't know where my strength came from. They told me that the pushing could last up to two hours...I wasn't going to do that. I closed my eyes and blocked everything out. All I said in that forty five mintues was "ok" then nod at my mom and Arles indicating that I was going to push.

It was so amazing and I was so amazed that I had that kind of will power to do it. I was so close and all I had wanted for nine months was to see my beautiful baby. I was so close. With every contraction I felt more and more ready to bring a new life into the world. Finally I heard Arles exclaim that he could see her. Never had I felt such a need to do what my body wanted me to do. I gave it everything I had and finally Doctor Coma pulled her out. This little tiny being was there. I couldn't say anything, I was in such shock that when asked if I wanted to hold her I just stared blankly at the nurse. But my mom answered for me and said yes.

The outpouring of emotion was amazing. Here was this child that I am now responsible for. Arles and I created her. She was finally here. There was so much running through my head. Every day I look at her and am in awe over how perfect she is. I love being a mom. I love that through the entire process my family and Arles and countless others were so willing to help me. I can finally say that I understand unconditional love. I love my little girl :)